Tech Support: What kind of computer do you have?
Customer: A white one

Customer: Hi, this is Celine.  I can't get my DVD out!
Tech Support: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure it's really stuck.
Tech Support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note
Customer: No, wait a minute, I hadn't inserted it yet.  It's still on my desk ... sorry 

Tech Support: Click onthe "MY COMPUTER" icon on the left of the screen
Customer: Your left or my left?

Tech Support: Hello, how may I help you?
Male Customer: Hi, I can't print
Tech Support: Would you click on START for me and . . . ....
Male Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me.  I'm not Bill Gates

Customer: Good afternoon, this is Martha.  I can't print.  Everytime i try, it say ... ..."CAN'T FIND PRINTER"  I even lifted the printer and placed it in fornt of the monitor, but the computer still says it cant find it !!!

Customer: I have a problem printing in red
Tech Support: Do you have a colour printer?
Customer: Aaaah ... sorry .... thank you

Tech Support: What is on your monitor now. ma'am? 
Customer: A teddy bear that my boyfriend bought for me at the SPAR

Customer: My keybaord is not working anymore.
Tech Support: Are you sure your keyboard is plugged into the computer?
Customer: No I can't get behind the computer.

Tech Support: Pick up your keyboard and take ten steps backwards.
Customer: OK
Tech Support: Did the keyboard come with you? 
Customer: Yes.

Tech Support: That mees the keyboard is not plugged in.  Is there another keyboard? 
Customer: Yes, there's another one here.  Wait a moment please.... Ah, that one dows work.  Thanks

Tech Support: Your password is the small letter 'a' as in apple, a capital letter 'V" as in Victor,and the number '7" 
Customer: Is the '7' in capital letters?

Customer: I can't get on the internet..
Tech Support: Are you absoluely sure you used the correct password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure.  I saw my co-worker do it.
Tech Support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five dots

Tech Support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape
Tech Support: That's not a anti-virus program... 
Customer: Oh, sorry ... Internet Explorer?

Customer: I have a huge problem!  My friend has placed a screen saver on my computer.... but everytime I move my mouse, it disappears....

Tech Support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first email...
Tech Support: Ok, what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the little circle around it?

A woman customer called Kwazulu Web's help desk because she had a problem with her printer
Tech Support: Are you running it under windows? 
Customer: No, my desk is next to the door, but tha is a good point.  The man sitting next to me is by a window, and his printer is working fine!

Tech Support: Okey Ron, press the control and escape keys at the same time.  That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen... Now, type the letter 'P' to bring up the Program Manager 
Customer: I don't have a 'P'
Tech Support: On your keyboard Ron
Customer: What do you mean? 
Tech Support: 'P'.... on your keyboard, Ron
Customer: I AM NOT DING THAT!!!

There.... That sould make us feel better abour our computer skills.... we will post more support questions and answers as we go along!!!